When my parents moved to the home where they now live, I was almost four and my sister almost one. A few years later, the Smiths arrived and within months my mother and Sibbie Smith had a path beaten across the field that separated the two homes... a path that led directly from one back door to the other.
What an easy friendship Sibbie and my mother had. They rarely telephoned one another; they simply showed up on each other's doorstep whatever the need — a cup of sugar or a cup of coffee and conversation. This went on for years, but eventually the Smiths bought another home across town and the relationship changed. Not that my mother and Sib don't maintain their friendship to this day, but they certainly don't enjoy that ease of visiting.
Somewhere along the way, by the time I left home for college, most mothers were working outside the home. My own mother returned to teaching to help with my education and things changed radically for her. When she returned home at the end of a day in the classroom, she simply didn't have the energy to pursue friendship in the way that she had before. She would sometimes mention it wistfully in passing.
Today, as I sit at my keyboard and try to stay connected at some level, I find myself wishing that more women were able to stay home. In those former times, women created the sense of neighborhood. They were the ones who cemented the kids and the husbands and everyone together in community. My father and Eb Smith were/are close friends because their wives were friends first.
By the time that I was a young wife and mother, I, too, was working outside the home. There were precious few hours to pursue friendships. They occurred naturally at the workplace, but not in the neighborhood. In fact, one was fortunate to know his or her neighbors. I didn't know all of mine. I didn't have a path beaten to my neighbor's back door.
What am I trying to spit out here? Just that I appreciate Blogdom for the sense of neighborhood that it provides. It may be artificial, but it is a good alternative to talking to oneself and twiddling thumbs. You see, there're precious few women I know, either in my neighborhood or out of it, who aren't in the workplace. Can you imagine if I visited and communicated this much with any one of those women I know who do not work outside the home? I'd wear out my welcome very soon.
So thank you for inviting me to your homes in Blogdom. Thank you for sharing your ideas and the books you read. Thank you for telling me about your projects, the flowers you grow, and the way you decorate.
You will note that I have made a few changes here. I really didn't want to, but
A Haven was getting quite sluggish and so slow in loading that I've had a few complaints. When it became a problem for me, I knew that something had to be done.
My plan is to feature five blogs a week in the new format right here and then rotate around. You may see that some blogs have been dropped at the new site and some new blogs have been added. I hope that you'll peek in on my buddies from time to time. This may not be a solution that works at all. I've agonized a fair bit because featuring other blogs makes me happy and I'd prefer to do it on this page. We'll see how it goes...
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We're celebrating another birthday today. John is 26...again. ;>
We baked
Tina's Chocolate Turtle Cake last night. You can find this delicious recipe right there with all the wonderful photos that Tina is so well known for doing. I'll leave you with a photo of molten caramel as a tease...